Friday, August 17, 2007

chinese torture

have you ever heard of the chinese torture?? heard its the worst kind and my poor erika is going thru it.

i think i am becoming a pushy parent. I dunno, I feel my judgement is way off sometimes. Now I have second thoughts or doubts about sending her to a Chinese school.

Erika has suddenly hate (that’s putting it mildly) her mandarin classes in school and when she brings home her mandarin homework, her mood will be sour.

Even popo didn’t escape her outburst! All we need to make her burst into tears ~ bring out her mandarin homework. Then buckets of tears and loud cries will be heard for a good 10 minutes. At first I got very annoyed, now I let her cry the good cry then get her do the work. There’s no escape with this mommy.

Especially with her mandarin spelling test which she has every week…so every week also outburst! I try to make it fun…let her play her piano (ya! that’s her incentive if she’s good…coz she can’t live without her precious black & white keys) then prepare her before hand that we will be doing the dreaded work.

Once I start, she will be all moody and long face. She doesn’t even wanna attempt to read the characters, even if she knows them (that makes me sooooo mad!) coz I am not even asking her to write them yet. i was so mad, i threw her book away (better than throw her out!!). she went to daddy for solace.

Of cos I dun expect her to get perfect score for her tests; she knows it coz I drum into her that it’s ok to make mistakes. The part I get so angry is she doesn’t even wanna give it a try!

Now for the finger pointing session (who to blame leh for her behaviour?)

- the teacher??
- the mommy??
- erika??
- the homework??
- daddy for not doing anything??

or do you think if she eat some Goji Berries or Goji Juice, it will help boost up her energy and concentration, making school a much better place to go to and more enthusiasm for her homework?

or i need to get her eyes checked? i could get her some Wholesale Reading Glasses. i dunno if it will help with those Wholesale Readers. i am willing to give anything a try! i am a desperate mommy.

or maybe i should get her some beautiful pink personalized pens as an incentive to do her work.

I remember I push her to her piano class and now she love it! so sometimes she needs a push.

I dunno, but I think I will just let her slog thru this Chinese primary school thing for a few years and hopefully she survives it! i haven't even join the majority motley crew of parents in sending her for mandarin tuition classes...that will be a real torment for her, do i wanna be that cruel?

maybe there's no escape once she gets into primary school, coz i am so "illiterate"

heard of this line before

"need to be cruel to be kind"


mott said...

somehow to me, when it comes to learning chinese ah.... the teacher is very impt. If the teacher really makes it interesting, instead of torturous...the kid will want to learn it.

my son also at first, fought with me (his kinder teaches mandarin). then one day, he changed and likes to do it very much. He said teacher praised him wor.... after that...attitude completely changed! WOO HOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mummy to QiQi said...

hmm....i remember the torture of study days, for i even din take up mandarin. gave up too early, *lousy me*..hehe...

CutiePrincessMummy said...

yea, understand how u feel. That's y i start introducing mandarin to my jiejie nowadays, if not i scared her will be scared away by those deep chinese in kindy & primary too...

really pity the student nowadays, the syllabus is so much higher than last time. I oso start to worry about my princesses homework in future. Kiasu kuah!! :P

NomadicMom said...

Definitely need to send to tuition class when she starts Std 1. Otherwise, you the one that is stressed.

Lian said...

That's why this question of when to quit and when to endure is such a confusing one. You really don't know how it will end up... really for their good? Some have happy endings, some do not.

MamaTang said...

hmm.. I didn't think of that yet as both my kids have not reach the age yet. Think at that time, I would be worried too.

laundryamah said...

tuition sometimes oso doesn't really solve all the problems..see la Kieran..good example but i'm not giving up..die die also make them learn Chinese they will learn to appreciate us when they reach Form 1!

Sabrina said...

Well..we are not cruel lar...Sometimes our kids just get into our nerves and we just hv to be strict with them...hehe.

huisia said...

everyone is worrying about mandarin, but i am worrying about english since primary language for jo isn't english.

Angeleyes said...

Aiyer, I'm also very worried now... We are also Mandarin illiterate.... Charm-charm-charm! :(

ryeli said...

yes the chinese torture, old school thinking for the chinese. i'm not chinese educated but i've been hearing about this torture when i was way younger and i was so glad i didn't go to one.

but my regret now is not knowing the language which is why i will be sending my kids to chinese school. my only consolation is that at least hubby speaks it and thus, he will be the one looking over their homework! hahaha.

anyway, don't give up...have to push! yes, be cruel to be kind. she will thank you one day.

shern's mom said...

maybe because kids nowadays do not speak mandarin at home, and it somehow became a 'foreign' language. just like goin to a french class. tough right.
im also illiterate..manyak susah.

Sasha said...

when u find the answer pls tell me
cos i also dilema dunno where to send jayden

Big Pumpkin said...

Depending on her temperament, I would have lots of talks with her and explain the importance of the language. Give her examples of the use of the language where she can understand and see it as a benefit to her. Like maybe saving someone or maybe her friends planning to play a trick on her etc.

Ask her what pictures she can make out of the Chinese characters? In making it fun.....unfortunately, it would be drawing time from you.

Also try to find out why she doesn't like it - have you met her teacher? It's either the teacher or she doesn't like it because she is not good at it, then you need to work on making her good at it in the gentlest way possible.

I have a friend from Kuen Cheng who swears Chinese school ripped her of her confidence and ruined her life. I do believe it's the approach.

None of us speak Mandarin at home but Tee loves Mandarin. It's because of her teacher, she is lucky she got the right teacher. Are you able to switch Mandarin teachers?

KittyCat said...

If you speak Mandarin and yet, you find it difficult, I wonder how it'll be for me as I'm in the same boat as Sasha! I know the benefits of studying Chinese but both hubby and I are not Chinese-educated, how to help Lucas with his homework? Also, I'm worried he may not be able to take the pressure too...

WMD: Wife, Mother, Daughter said...

I echo Sasha and Kittycat. next year have to register for school and shd I change my mind, it must be because I don't think I can take the pressure of putting my child to chinese school.